You are here: Home / Archives for Articles

Teach Your Child the Principles of Quality

12/07/2008 by

Raising a child does not have to be by guess and by gosh and hope you're doing it right. Parenting is an activity, and like any and every action or activity, it is subject to the principles of quality. When the principles of quality are known and applied, high quality follows. Even more important, since children learn mainly by example, they learn and apply the principles of quality in their own lives, and do very well in all regards.

From infancy, through toddlerhood, into childhood, and from there on out, children do what they see works. If crying gets results, they cry. If anger works, they are angry. They don't understand until much later, if ever, that what worked with their parents when they were very young might not work in other settings. So they keep on crying, or being angry, since they know it works, and it's the only thing they know works. Their lives are not very happy.

Enter the principles of quality. What does it mean to be a high quality parent? Exactly the same as being a high quality violinist, telephone repairman, baseball player, or retail clerk. They get good results. High quality doesn't happen by accident or by making good guesses. High quality is based on the principles of quality. Anyone who is better than average at a particular activity is applying some of these principles, whether they know it or not.

Here is the other side of the coin: anyone who is applying the principles of quality, to any activity, will get good results. In the case of parents, other parents will envy them for having such great kids.

So what are the three Major Principles of quality, the four Applied Principles, and the thirteen Quality Actions? Far more than will fit in one article. But here is the first Major Principle, on which all the rest are based, and without which all the rest will not work very well if at all:

Quality is an attitude.

This is true. Quality is not a skill or a talent or high intelligence or a gift. Quality comes directly from the desire to do something better, get better results, improve something. The most wonderful thing about this principle is that anyone can do it. Starting anytime. That desire is yours if you want it, and no one, absolutely no one, can stop you from having it.

Notice also, that the Quality Attitude is a desire to do something better, to get better results. A person who is improving, even if he is not good yet, is succeeding. Failure is only lack of improvement. A brand new parent might not be a good parent at first. But if he or she wants to get better at it, and does what it takes to get better at it, eventually he or she will be a good parent, a high quality parent, and his or her kids will be great kids.

So how do you get better at something? Once you have this Quality Attitude, what do you do with it? You apply the other principles of quality. They are also freely available for anyone, without special training. They are talked about in other articles by the same author, so look them up.

But only if you want to do something better, get better results, or improve something.

Author Bio: Don Dewsnap has spent years studying quality and its principles and applications. Now he has put his knowledge into a readable, useable book: Anyone Can Improve His or Her Life: The Principles of Quality. Read an excerpt or buy this book in paperback or as an e-book at Principles-of-Quality.com or as a paperback at any major online bookseller.

 

Filed Under: Articles · Tagged With: great kids, Parenting, principles of quality, quality

5 Reasons Why Spanking Children is an Absolute No-No

11/07/2008 by

The bottom line is that spanking is not beneficial. Period.

As you will soon discover in this article, spanking your children can actually have a number of negative results, the exact opposite of what you were trying to achieve. Over the years, many in-depth studies and research have been performed to determine if spanking is or is not beneficial and the majority shows it simply does no good at all.

I've outlined below the top five reasons why spanking children is literally a waste of your time, energy and effort.

Violence

In today's world of violence, as seen on television, in games, movies, and so on, the last thing we need to be doing is exposing our children to even more violence at the hands of the parents. After all, how can you teach a child not to hit or be violent if you are spanking and hitting them? Spanking children teaches your child about violence, plain and simple. As a result, many children who are spanked by their parents, feel they have the right to hit when they are disappointed or angry with someone, which is or course not acceptable.

Authority

When a parent spanks a child, the child often views this as overwhelming authority gone badly. Then, going into their teenage years, and even adulthood, this same child begins to struggle with authority in the workplace or from law enforcement officials. Having been under the control of the parent who spanked them, these children desperately want to escape that.

Reinforcement

To teach your children right from wrong, you will get much better results by providing positive reinforcement and communication rather than by spanking them. In other words, reward your child when he or she does something right, which encourages more of the right things. The same is true with communication in that if more parents were to honestly, lovingly, but firmly communicate with their children, the need for spanking would be eliminated all together.

Barriers

Spanking children also creates huge barriers between the parent and the child. As your child grows older, you want him or her to feel as if the relationship with the parent is a trusted one. When you spank, the child can easily become distrustful and isolated, which means that later in their life, dealing with the big issues will be extremely challenging for them.

Counterproductive

Spanking children is counterproductive, promoting anxiety and fear, provoking anger, and destroying sensitivity and compassion for other people, as well as for him or herself. You want your child to grow up feeling confident and self-assured but spanking actually tears a child down.

Spousal Abuse

Interestingly, many studies can now link spanking children to spousal abuse. Although not intended as abuse, the child may have perceived it as such and the perception is reality. Unfortunately, these children grow up believing that when they become upset, it is okay to hit everyone else, often seeing as a hit to their husband or wife as "spanking", but in a twisted way.

Author Bio: Jamie Sullivan is a mother of 3 children aged between 4-16 years old and an author of "Child Anger Revealed - Your Ultimate Guide To Deal With Them Effectively" at http://www.ManageYourChild.com.

 

Filed Under: Articles ·

5 Steps to Talking to Children About Lying

11/07/2008 by

Unfortunately, lying is typically a part of every child's life. There is no exact point where our children pick up lying. It can be as young as three years old! But at some point in their life, they all give lying their best shot.

Obviously, no parent wants to have a child that lies but expect it and then consider these helpful steps to stopping it. When it comes to talking to our children about lying, the conversation needs to be formulated for success.

1. You can start by telling your child that you know he or she has been lying and. You can then provide them with specific examples. Very often, just being busted by the parents is enough to stop this bad behavior of the child. Even if your action does not make an immediate change, your child needs to understand that you do pay attention to things they said and that you will pay even closer attention in the future.

2. Then, slowly explain to your child why lying is so bad. Remember that children lie for many reasons. They can be for good and for bad. For instance, some children will actually lie as a means of pleasing a parent and not wanting the parent to feel disappointed if they forgot to do something. These are considered a 'good lie', even though they should not really do it. Therefore, you will need to tell your child why lying is a bad behavior, even when done for good reasons.

3. Always maintain eye contact with your child when you are talking to them. This type of one-on-one communication lets the child know that you are serious. Typically, direct eye contact will make the child feel nervous and uncomfortable. With this, he or she may decide that lying is not worth it if he or she has to go through another conversation like the last one.

4. Talking to your children about lying allows you to show him or her the type of damage done when untruths are told. For the most part, your children never give a second thought to what the lies are doing and will do. This gives you the perfect opportunity to explain how lying hurts and even causes serious damage in numerous ways. Understanding the consequences of the lies might be what your child needs to know.

5. Finally, when talking to children about lying, consider a great method used by Dr. Laura. She had a problem at one time of her son lying. She turned the tables on him, deciding that she too would lie to let him see how it felt. One day, she told her son to go to his room and pack his bags because they were going to Disneyworld the next day. Well, he was thrilled and hurried off to pack. When he started asking specific questions, she said, "Oh, I'm sorry, I was lying." She continued this for one week and you can be sure he never lied to her again.

Author Bio: Jamie Sullivan is a mother of 3 children aged between 4-16 years old and an author of "Child Anger Revealed - Your Ultimate Guide To Deal With Them Effectively" at http://www.ManageYourChild.com.

Filed Under: Articles · Tagged With: talking to children about lying

The 411 On Bummis Products

09/07/2008 by

Bummis makes great cloth diapers covers to suit all your baby's needs. They have a wide variety of styles and prints, sure to please even the pickiest parents! Here are some of the great products made by Bummis.

Bummis Super Whisper Wrap

This great diaper cover features Aplix closings, which is similar to Velcro. This ensures that you get a super adjustable diaper cover to fit your baby perfectly. They have non binding elastic around the legs and the waist to be sure that none of the messes leak through. It also features polyester knit bindings to ensure comfort. The Super Whisper Wrap is able to stand up to industrial washing and drying, so you can be sure that these diaper covers will last you a long time. You can use this cover with prefolds, fitted, or snap diapers. You don't have to change this each time. If it is damp, simply line dry it. If it is soiled, though, be sure you wash it.

Bummis Super Snap Diaper Cover

These are very similar to the Super Whisper Wrap, but instead of the Aplix closing, they have durable plastic snaps. Many parents prefer snaps because they do not snag in the wash and they tend to last longer. The drawback is that they are not as adjustable as Aplix. They can be washed and dried at normal temperatures, and used with all cloth diapers.

Bummis Super Brite Diaper Cover

The Super Brite Diaper Cover comes in fun prints, and has an Aplix closing for a great fit. They have gusseted leg openings with lycra to fit even the smaller legs and to keep messes in. This is not a bulky diaper cover. It is only one layer of polyester and has a laminated inside. This means that all you have to do is wipe it down and you are good to go!

Polar Bummis

Polar Bummis are the ultimate in luxurious diaper covers. These are made from super soft fleece inside and out with a layer of laminate in between to stop wetness. The special fleece will not pil and is guaranteed for up to 100 washings! This material is very breathable and lightweight, so it doesn't get too hot, even in the summer. This is nice, trim diaper cover that works with any type of cloth diaper.

Swimmi

The Swimmi is a perfect cloth swim diaper. It works great so that there are no leaks or messes in the pool. It has a mesh layer on the inside so it is easy to clean out the solids, and a coated nylon layer as well to keep it from leaking. There are great prints that are suitable for a boy or girl and has those great adjustable Aplix closings.

Training Pants

Bummis makes the perfect training pant. They are waterproof on the outside to stop leaks, but the terry cloth inside lets your child know when he is wet. This makes for faster potty training. The elastic waist make them easy to pull on and off just like real underwear.

Author Bio: Bummis makes wonderful products for your child's cloth diaper and potty training needs. These are high quality, earth friendly products that are good for your baby and easy for you to use.

Filed Under: Articles · Tagged With: baby diapers, Bummis, cloth diapers, diapering, diapers