As a grandmother of four grandchildren under the age of five, it's often overwhelming when they all come over to my house for a visit. On the occasions that I have been left alone with them, babysitting or just playing with them, they often become boisterous and loudly competitive, sometimes difficult to control.

One day, anticipating their arrival, I decided to turn on some quiet, soothing music and to have it playing during their visit. I wondered if it would help keep them calmer and, hopefully, more quiet than usual, (I already had a slight headache, even before their arrival). My oldest grandson noticed the music. I asked him if he liked it, and he said yes, that it sounded like "sleepy music," so I left it on, quietly in the background.

After about a half hour, I noticed, (happily, I might add), that the children were playing "nicely" together, and that the atmosphere was generally less noisy and more relaxed than on previous visits. And my headache, (albeit with the aid of an aspirin), was noticeably better.

Upon reflection, I considered that the change in their general behavior was largely due to the calming influence of the music. I was reluctant to challenge my hypothesis by changing to more upbeat music, as I was enjoying the peaceful atmosphere too much and didn't want to risk it. But I was impressed with the obvious power inherent in music and how conducive it was for a peaceful experience .

When I was a music student studying Music Therapy, I learned that it is therapeutic to match a patient's mood with music of the same or similar mood. This surprised me, because I thought that if a particular patient was, for example, depressed, then wouldn't it follow that, in order to help the patient out of depression, it would be more helpful to play "happy' music? Not so, according to the music therapy experts. It is apparently preferable to allow the particular mood rather than fight it, as the patient often experiences more agitation when listening to music opposite their mood.

Maybe it was a lucky coincidence that my grandchildren were calmer and more mellow than usual that day - maybe the music actually matched their moods. I wonder, which actually came first - their moods or the music?
I think that either case is feasible: sometimes a mood might be improved upon with the judicial use of appropriate music and conversely, music can possibly aggravate a given mood. I find it interesting that music can support emotions or exacerbate them.

It was a lovely afternoon with the grandkids. Maybe the music assisted them in achieving a more peaceful afternoon at their grandmother's house. I know one thing, they were visibly more relaxed, more attentive to storytelling and story books and less combative and aggressive. Maybe I just got lucky that day. Perhaps I'll test my theory further another day during another visit, but I'll make sure that I don't have a headache if I do..

Author Bio: Lull your baby into a deep, peaceful sleep so you can get the rest you deserve. Composer Patrice Cosier has blended lullaby style and form with relaxation techniques in her uniquely beautiful CD of original lullabies, "Good Night Lullabies." Get two free lullabies at http://www.goodnightlullaby.com

Category: Parenting
Keywords: calm kids down,relaxation,help baby sleep,babies sleeping,noisy kids,get baby sleep

What makes one child excited and another fearful about trying new experiences?

What makes one child put forth extensive effort toward something and another give up easily in discouragement?

What makes one child intensely curious and another closed down to new learning?

It is their set of beliefs - their way of thinking - that determines their behavior and outlook. Their beliefs determine their frame of mind, their approach to life, their attitude about themselves and their abilities.

BELIEFS THAT PROMOTE LEARNING, BELIEFS THAT PROMOTE FEAR

What kind of beliefs foster openness to learning and what kind of beliefs create a sense of fear and limitation?

Surprisingly, beliefs such as "I am smart" or "I am talented" or "I am gifted" tend to create limitation rather than openness. When children are told, "You are so smart" or "You are so talented," they have a tendency to get attached to the approval of being smart or talented and may become fearful of failure. They may decide that if they put forth great effort toward learning something and they fail, that this will prove that they are not as smart or as talented as their parents or teachers believe them to be. They may learn to attach their worth to being smart or talented and may see themselves as a failure if they fail at something.

On the other hand, children who are praised for EFFORT rather than ABILITY (see "Mindset" by Dr. Carol Dweck), learn to value themselves for their openness to learning and their efforts toward their goal, rather than for achieving the goal itself. These children get excited by the process of learning itself and experience a sense of worth in the effort, growth, and learning, rather than their sense of worth being attached to the outcome.

ENJOYING THE CHALLENGE OR ATTACHED TO THE OUTCOME

Children who enjoy a challenge receive a sense of self-validation from the effort itself, while children who are attached to outcomes receive a sense of worth mainly through the approval of others.

There is a huge difference between children who believe that "The harder I work, the smarter I get" or "The more I practice, the better I get," and children who believe, "I am smart so I don't have to work hard," or "I am talented and I can just fall back on my talent." Research indicates that raw intelligence or talent is not enough.

"It's always been accepted that by hard work, training, and exercise it's possible to develop intellectual faculties or an intellectual mastery well above the average

Babies often don't adhere to the schedule their parents set out for them for sleep. Especially when it comes to napping. Since babies are incapable of communicating to their parents when they are tired, it's a good idea to keep to a regular schedule before they become over tired and cranky. This prevents a possible temper tantrum and the resulting power struggle between parent and child.

One reliable method for getting your baby on a regular schedule for napping is to make a nap time routine that is similar to your night time bed routine. For example, if at night you make a practice of reading a story to your child, then read a story before the nap, albeit a shorter one than you would read at night. If you are in the habit of singing a lullaby or playing soft, soothing music, then do so before the nap, (again, make it a bit shorter in duration than you would at night). Although these practices aren't an exact duplicate of the night time bed time routine,they are similar, and the child will gradually understand that it's time for sleep.

Another issue with naps, is that the child may stay asleep for only a short time, maybe only fifteen to twenty minutes. If babies cry out for their parent, it probably means that they haven't learned how to soothe themselves yet. A good idea is to call out to the child, tell them that they are okay and that you are close by. This method gives babies a feeling of safety and assists them in learning how to comfort themselves. It also helps them to understand that nap time isn't over yet. Very often, when babies learn to self - soothe in this way, they will fall back asleep, and gradually the duration of their naps increases.

Mothers lead very busy lives these days, and sometimes while attending to the many chores that need to be done, running errands, and maybe carting their other children around, the baby will fall asleep in the car or stroller. A simple fifteen minute nap can wreak havoc with the baby's schedule. If feasible, let your baby sleep as long as possible. If that's not an option, try carrying the baby quietly to bed upon arriving home. A good way to avoid this is, of course, to do your best to plan errands around the baby's schedule. If you have to be away from home, give them toys to play with in the car, sing songs while riding around and make the car noisy and stimulating for the purpose of keeping the baby awake until the scheduled nap time.

It's a daunting undertaking to be a parent and each day presents new challenges. Optimally, naps are structured into your's and your baby's day. It has been proven that keeping your baby on a sleep schedule reaps many benefits, including good health, a stronger immune system, a happier baby and more well rested parents. If you keep to a schedule, nap time can be a win win for baby and parents because everyone benefits.

Author Bio: Lull your baby into a deep, peaceful sleep so you can get the rest you deserve. Compose Patrice Cosier has blended lullaby style and form with relaxation techniques in her uniquely beautiful CD of original lullabies, "Good Night Lullabies." Get two free lullabies at http://www.goodnightlullaby.com

Category: Parenting
Keywords: napping,naps,baby nap,getting baby to sleep,get baby sleep,baby sleep through night

Nothing is more frustrating for a new parent than hearing your baby cry and being unable to soothe him. As a parent you want only the best for your baby and it is so important to get your baby sleep, sleep your baby needs to be rested, calm and happy.

Here are three ways to get baby to sleep fast:

1. Calm yourself first. Babies are highly intuitive and pick up on their parents moods and vibrations. If you are anxious, nervous or upset, your baby will be cranky and restless. Take a warm bath, listen to music or take a time out and go for a walk before attempting to comfort your baby when he or she is very cranky and won't sleep. Your baby will feel the change in your mood and start calming down immediately.

2. Establish a bedtime routine. It does not matter if your baby is very young, it is never to early to get your baby into a routine to get baby sleep. This also means making sure your baby is on a feeding schedule. One of the worst mistakes parents make is letting their baby "graze" and eat whenever they want. A good rule of thumb for young babies who are breast fed is nursing every one and half to two hours and for formula fed babies, every three to four hours. If baby becomes cranky before those times, it is probably because he has gas or needs a diaper change. If you make sure your baby is nursing 10 to 15 minutes on each breast at a feeding or taking in the required amount of formula for his age, he should be able to last until the next feeding.

3. Play Lullabies. Music is proven to soothe and calm babies. In fact, hospital nurseries, especially the neonatal units, play music to calm babies. a fast way to get baby to sleep is to put on a collection of lullabies without vocals that uses classic music. I have composed my own lullabies in my CD, Good Night Lullabies, and you can get two free lullabies to try by going to www.goodnightlullaby.com

Here is a very little known method to get baby sleep that you won't read about in most baby books. Only experienced mothers are familiar with this trick. You will need a pacifier. Now, do not be concerned that your baby will develop nipple confusion, buck teeth or have a binky in his mouth until he is 5 years old. A pacifier is perfect fine to use if taken away by 6-9 months old. For this technique to be successful, you should offer your baby a pacifier early on so that he won't reject it later.

Here is the trick:

During the night, when you hear your baby starting to fuss, immediately go to him and offer a pacifier instead of feeding him. He will suck for a while and then will most likely spit it out and start fussing again. Go back in and offer it again. The goal is to prolong the time between nightly feedings and help your baby fall back into a deep sleep. Each night, the time between feedings should be increased until you eventually have a baby who sleeps through the night.

Caution: This should only be used with babies who are at the age and weight to sleep through the night. Do not use on a small baby who needs the night time calories.

Author Bio: Lull your baby into a deep, peaceful sleep so you can get the rest you deserve. Compose Patrice Cosier has blended lullaby style and form with relaxation techniques in her uniquely beautiful CD of original lullabies, "Good Night Lullabies." Get two free lullabies at http://www.goodnightlullaby.com

Category: Parenting
Keywords: get baby sleep,gassy baby,gas baby,help baby sleep,getting baby to sleep,bottle feeding baby